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The National Association of Child Care Resource & Referral Agencies (NACCRRA) and Child Care Aware do not endorse nor are we responsible for the information or materials posted on any of the resource’s websites.He is Not the Same as Me...
April 23, 2007
You may have heard this story, possibly even experienced it yourself. Your little one repeats something he’s seen or heard. You hear him making rude or tactless comments about a friend, relative, or someone he doesn’t even know. This may cause a great deal of embarrassment for parents, but it can also be a learning experience.
As a parent, you may realize more and more that your child is very quick to catch on to his surroundings, sometimes quicker than what you might expect. The things he is picking up include what you do or say, both positive and negative.
Despite what you might think, your child does listen to what you say. He watches how you act and remembers it. As children grow, they form opinions about things and people. These opinions may be based on feelings or experiences he’s had, but also by things he may have seen you do or heard you say. Because you have a large impact on your child’s development, your words and actions leave quite a mark on your child. Today, children may be facing diversity earlier and more frequently than when you grew up. They may have questions about the differences they see, and why someone is not the same as you or he. It is important that children know that all of their friends, family, and all people, are not the same, and it is ok if someone is different.
Here are a few tips to help your child learn to be open-minded about people and their differences. These tips have been adapted from the National Association for the Education of Young Children, Early Years Are Learning Years™:
- Provide books, toys, videos, etc. that can create an understanding of diversity, such as:
- men and women in non-traditional roles,
- people of color in leadership positions,
- people with disabilities doing activities familiar to children, and
- various types of families and family activities.
- Do not be biased in the friends, doctors, teachers, and other service providers that you choose, or in the stores where you shop.
- Help children understand that a person's looks are never an acceptable reason for teasing or rejecting them. Step in right away if you hear or see your child behave in such a way.
- Provide opportunities for children to interact with other children who are racially/culturally different from themselves and with people who have various disabilities.
- Respectfully listen to and answer children's questions about themselves and others. Don't ignore, change the subject, or in any way make the child think she is bad for asking such a question.
- Use accurate and fair images in contrast to stereotypes, and encourage children to talk about the differences. Help them to think seriously about what they see in books, movies, greeting cards, comics, and on TV.
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